Hi, this is Brock. I changed my name to a "." to express how I have been feeling recently. Its only been two weeks since I last posted but I thought I would drop in and tell you all that I miss you even though I have never met you. I am so blessed to have this place where I can feel welcome.
The above is my favorite self-portrait, because its so vague, and to me that is attractive, perhaps because it leaves so much to the imagination. But I honestly feel ugly, I have been working on my self-image and trying to come to terms with how I look, body image, etc. Ironic that somebody who is so vain can feel so ugly.
The above picture is from last Halloween, which was pretty depressing. I was, as usual, the only person who dressed up. That is sort of the story of my life. This picture expresses my current feelings too.
This last image was supposed to be a self-portrait, but the camera flashed. It is very odd because I was in a church museum filled with old things, and gobs of pictures of all kinds of dead people espesially. So even though I have had the flash do this before before I think it odd that it completely vanished me from the shot and that there is a doll standing next to this old mirror, I don't even remember trying to include her in the picture in the first place, I was just snapping away. It does seem like a fitting picture since Halloween is coming up.
9 Comments:
I hadn't even thought about Hallowe'en being so close...where does the time go?
you know the way brock you realy do !!! ;-)
I'm glad that you posted and are communicating with us. Always know that we're here.
The flash in the last shot is a happy accident; great shot.
Brock, you are amazingly beautiful, artistic and creative. You musn't doubt yourself.
You are at a time of life that is so precious.
You have so much to offer.
That you look into yourself and question accentuates the fact that you are a person of depth and fine quality.
We all have regrets and doubts about ourselves from time to time. Don't give in to yours.
Things will get better.
oxo jo
What's up Brock? hey, first off, these are some excellent pics. Secondly, glad to have you back. It's been some time now.
I just want to say that what you're feeling can be pretty normal. You are accomplishing so much for your age. I was such a freakin' slacker it seems when I was your age (at least on a self-motivating art-making front). I personally find this time of year to be a more reflective time too. I think happiness slowly comes with age too, so hang in there, embrace the vagueness and go with it, have fun with it, and most of all, refuse to feel ugly (everyone goes through that from time to time). I think of people who have it way worse than you and me--born with defects, physically or emotionally damaged somehow in a big way, and realize it's not so bad in times of doubt. Not to at all undermine your state of mind lately--again, that's natural. Anyhow, get out there, have fun, talk to people, make the world your oyster. Looking forward to more pix!
I can relate with all you have said. I don't like me either at times. Just know you are loved, and so is your art. Just look at how beautiful you made me
I don't look this good!
I love halloween too. I just ordered the kids' costumes. Victoria is going to be a Native American princess, Julia, a fairy, and Brenden, a monkey because he is always hanging on me like a monkey. He thinks my bra strap is a handle!
He has now learned how to climb on top of the dining room table!
Great portraits my friend. I think everyone has self image problems. Some of us try to overcome them by lifting weights :). I think as you get older though that those self image problems become less and less important. You will be fine. :)
OMG! BROCK!!! You are young, alive and handsome. Don't do that to yourself. The most important things in life you already have. Wait till you will be old and sick (like me) :))) I have been inside for 3 weeks now! Just walking normally is a gift of life! Listen to the Old Lady! (moi heheheheh). Your pics are beautiful! And I prefer the second one. You look like the Che! :)
I was wondering who was that mysterious "."!!! :O)
I'm not going to give you any advice (mmmm, have the feeling I said that before...). What everybody said before is already so full of maturity that I have nothing to say more.
But you made me realize something. When a person is talking like you do, the other are naturally tempted to give advice, to help the other one. And this is very good and very important. But I realized that the feeling that you are showing to us, those Oh! so dark feeling that are becoming to be so typical of yours, I kind of like that!
Let me explain this right! I don't like when you feel depress or bad. I like that you are able to express it and in a way so beautiful! You are an artist Brock! And it is probably because we all have those feeling from time to time that it touch us so deeply.
And another thing that I like is that seeing everybody's comment, I learn more about them, and everybody is sooooooooo coooooooool!!!!!!!!!
:O)
hugs
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